Uke - Friend or Foe

 

Through "martial arts", we strive for the ultimate truth, enlightenment, or personal goals. We seek equilibrium, tranquillity, and wisdom. We yearn to experience harmony and unity - the beauties of life. However, although all these things are active and dynamic, you can't "do" any of them, they are states. Through the practice of Budo, we begin to acquire these states by understanding its principles.

So how does Budo fit in, what are we doing in the dojo? Many people see martial arts as a way of keeping fit with the added bonus of learning self-defense. Of course, physical activity promotes fitness and one is only too familiar with that "end of session" sensation that the force of gravity has doubled! As much as Budo has exercised and stretched the muscles, it pales in comparison to the extremes of the emotional spectrum that one travels, through practicing the martial arts.

What we feel, our opinions, and our attitudes make us the individual that we are. Being in touch with ourselves is a primary requisite to relate to others, and genuinely follow the Way of Kushin, Aiki (or as Shakespeare almost said - a mountain top by any other name still has a pretty good view!)

Ironically, forever analyzing oneself and searching inwardly tends to be unrewarding and frustrating. "Seek and you shall find!", it is through others that we learn to find ourselves. It is no cliche to say that those who give the most of themselves gain the most from Budo.

The process begins the first time we step on the tatami. The first time we bow to a partner, giving ourselves to them despite the fact we cannot even break-fall to save ourselves. Both Uke and Nage "give" all of the time, both roles carry a tremendous responsibility and reach deep down into the souls of those who practice bringing forth, via our emotions, the ultimate truth of who we really are. During training, individuals have a genuine desire to share and experience unity. If this desire is lacking in one partner, training can prove to be a rather traumatic experience for the other. We meditate at the start of the session to liberate ourselves from the day's trials and tribulations so that we may train with integrity and receptive minds.

As a Uke, we may have felt a great "high" when we performed our first break-fall. This sense of achievement continues as our break-falls for example become more spectacular, giving rise to a tremendous sense of freedom as we literally fly through the air without fear of a painful landing. It is important to trust Nage to have the compassion and perception to know if the movement is "right" to execute a full projection or whether it is better to hold back and let Uke take control of the break-fall. A generous Nage will tune into his Uke's mood and rapidly assess how far to push them (generosity does not come with experience alone). It is this attitude, that creates the atmosphere where growth and self-confidence can develop. This is where the virtues of bushido, and the essence of humanity come together in mutual harmony, perpetually evolving. 

A selfish or ignorant Nage who ignores the fact that his partner is anxious or off, from that day can leave his Uke feeling physically abused and emotionally battered. Trust is lost and self-confidence plummets.

Unfortunately, people may be unaware they are doing this. It is easy to assume that one is alone in this feeling of utter violation though in time one understands that this is not, sometimes at the risk of sounding arrogant, these people are treated as ignorant in that they know no better. We trust that it is not their intention to "trash" their uke but difficult to say. "For some, that is a horrendous experience, feeling used and abused". Likewise, Tori can feel that Uke is being deliberately difficult, yet how can he say, " Are you trying to help me or are you just showing me how strong you are?". Theoretically, it is possible to say this to somebody of the same grade or below. In practice, though people get upset, and feel criticized, becoming defensive of themselves and their teachers. The discipline or protocol prevents one from saying anything like this to a higher grade as it can be construed as showing disrespect and a lack of humility.

A helpful Uke can enable his partner to develop the ability to read the energy flow of an opposing force and experience the exhilaration that occurs when two spirits merge. Some can judge if resistance at any given time will be constructive. If a technique isn't executed there is no blending and Nage learns nothing (except maybe how not to be a Uke), and leaves the Dojo feeling useless and demoralized.

Budo is not self-defense, it is the preservation of life, and those who need a "technique" to prove themselves have lost sight of the fundamental principles and ethics of Bushido. By giving everything, to enhance the Budo of our partners an atmosphere of creativity and light embraces all those who train within it. To remain calm when surrounded by aggression, and to harmonize with the opposition is not a natural ability, it has to be learned and a dojo is supposed to be the place to learn it.

At its best, a Dojo introduces us to ourselves. We recognize our faults and lessen them by developing our redeeming features. We become more positive in our dealing with life. We learn to like ourselves so others may love us, we learn to love our world so that it may thrive and prosper.

Unfortunately, at its worst, a Dojo is an arena where the strongest "wins", until someone stronger still, comes along. Those left at the wayside feel inadequate and small, losing their confidence to face all that life may throw at them.

It is up to us to make our Dojo great, havens of peace where open hearts and minds can experience the pleasure of sharing the Way of

Kyushin.